Thursday, June 01, 2006
Attitude Adjustment
My "little boys" are grown now. We have three of them, ages 23 and 21. They've turned into fine, decent, hard working young men, and I am intensely proud of them.
Years ago I took them with me to do some grocery shopping. They were about 4 and 6 at the time, and they were being pretty typical kids that day. Full of their usual piss and vinegar. Refusing to sit in the seat, grabbing stuff off the shelf, begging for candy, etc. Don't get me wrong, they weren't running amok, just being "kids." That's all. But I had started the day out on a bad foot. We were out of coffee, amongst other things. That was one of the reasons I was there. (My day doesn't go so good iffen I don't get my first cup of Joe.) My loving wife, having had quite enough testosterone that morning ("Even the goddam cat's a male!!!" she snarled.) "asked" me to take them with me on my errands. I sensed this was one of those times when it's not healthy for a husband to say "Gee, I'd rather not, dear." We all piled into the Vista-Cruiser, and after stopping a couple of times to put them back into the car seats, (Boy they got good at springing themselves out of those things.) we finally arrived at the store. This particular store had free cups of coffee at the front door for customers. That's why I usually patronized this establishment. But I knew there was no way I could hold a cup of coffee and manage the rug rats, so I reluctantly passed it up, opting instead to wait until I got home and make a fresg pot. Down one aisle and up the next we went, with me growing more and more irritated as time passed. As I grew more and more irritated, I started to have some pretty pissy thoughts and emotions about being "stuck" with them. I was full of resentments in those days, and this day was no different from the rest. At about the next to the last aisle, I'd just about had it, and was seriously contemplating grabbing them by their scruffs, leaving the cart full of stuff right there, (Why, you're welcome mister store flunky. Any time!!) and dragging them back out to the car in a huge self serving hissy fit. "Dammit, why'd I get stuck with these little brats??? Why'd MY life go into the toilet like this??? Why ME??????" You know, that sort of selfish self centered type of thinking. Right at the end of the aisle, and just before my snapping point, around the end of the aisle came a woman pushing HER son in a wheel chair. This young boy, about 8 or 9, appeared to have about the worst case of cerebral palsy I've ever seen. His head was in a clamp-like device to keep it still, his arms were secured by straps, and he was belted into the chair, his body and face contorted by the disease. The look on his mom's face said it all. She looked at my healthy active kids, smiled nicely, said "Have a good day sir!" and moved on. I'm certain she'd have paid ANY price to have her boy jump up out of that wheelchair and start doing the same things my boys were doing.
Talk about attitude adjustment time.
Man.
Since that day, I've come to believe there's no such thing as "coincidence." I underwent a change of heart and realized just how lucky a man I was. I've had to conquer a lot of other demons since that day. But everytime since then when I've grown annoyed with my kids, or any situation for that matter, I think back to that day, and remind myself that I have much to be thankful for.
Have a nice day!
Years ago I took them with me to do some grocery shopping. They were about 4 and 6 at the time, and they were being pretty typical kids that day. Full of their usual piss and vinegar. Refusing to sit in the seat, grabbing stuff off the shelf, begging for candy, etc. Don't get me wrong, they weren't running amok, just being "kids." That's all. But I had started the day out on a bad foot. We were out of coffee, amongst other things. That was one of the reasons I was there. (My day doesn't go so good iffen I don't get my first cup of Joe.) My loving wife, having had quite enough testosterone that morning ("Even the goddam cat's a male!!!" she snarled.) "asked" me to take them with me on my errands. I sensed this was one of those times when it's not healthy for a husband to say "Gee, I'd rather not, dear." We all piled into the Vista-Cruiser, and after stopping a couple of times to put them back into the car seats, (Boy they got good at springing themselves out of those things.) we finally arrived at the store. This particular store had free cups of coffee at the front door for customers. That's why I usually patronized this establishment. But I knew there was no way I could hold a cup of coffee and manage the rug rats, so I reluctantly passed it up, opting instead to wait until I got home and make a fresg pot. Down one aisle and up the next we went, with me growing more and more irritated as time passed. As I grew more and more irritated, I started to have some pretty pissy thoughts and emotions about being "stuck" with them. I was full of resentments in those days, and this day was no different from the rest. At about the next to the last aisle, I'd just about had it, and was seriously contemplating grabbing them by their scruffs, leaving the cart full of stuff right there, (Why, you're welcome mister store flunky. Any time!!) and dragging them back out to the car in a huge self serving hissy fit. "Dammit, why'd I get stuck with these little brats??? Why'd MY life go into the toilet like this??? Why ME??????" You know, that sort of selfish self centered type of thinking. Right at the end of the aisle, and just before my snapping point, around the end of the aisle came a woman pushing HER son in a wheel chair. This young boy, about 8 or 9, appeared to have about the worst case of cerebral palsy I've ever seen. His head was in a clamp-like device to keep it still, his arms were secured by straps, and he was belted into the chair, his body and face contorted by the disease. The look on his mom's face said it all. She looked at my healthy active kids, smiled nicely, said "Have a good day sir!" and moved on. I'm certain she'd have paid ANY price to have her boy jump up out of that wheelchair and start doing the same things my boys were doing.
Talk about attitude adjustment time.
Man.
Since that day, I've come to believe there's no such thing as "coincidence." I underwent a change of heart and realized just how lucky a man I was. I've had to conquer a lot of other demons since that day. But everytime since then when I've grown annoyed with my kids, or any situation for that matter, I think back to that day, and remind myself that I have much to be thankful for.
Have a nice day!
"The most exciting phrase to hear in science, the one that heralds new discoveries, is not 'Eureka!' (I found it!) but 'That's funny ..."
Isaac Asimov
